Mission #136: AA Meeting

As I sat around the the Avenger's headquarters, flipping through magazines, Carol entered and sat near me. Then Tony arrived and looked me over. "We need a ride."

"Where?" I asked, not looking up.

"Our AA meeting." Carol huffed.

"Fly."

"Well... We wanted you to drive us so we wouldn't draw any attention." Carol begged.

"Tony has a driver."

"He's on vaction." Tony said.

"Fine." I said, raising myself off the couch.

Soon we arrived at their AA meeting. I was aghast, seeing all the beer bellied men. Several tried to hit on me, so I merely insisted that I was unavailable. Thank God the meeting started soon.

I yawned as I heard speech after speech about the alchoholics drinking habits. Soon it was Carol's turn.

"Hi. My name is Carol." she began.

"Hi Carol." the room chanted monotonously.

"Its been three weeks since I last had a drink." The room clapped. "Its been rough. After numerous... uh... arguements, I just want to have a drink to unwind. Ever since that little bitch Rogue stole-" she stopped herself, seeing she had gripped so hard into the podium, it was starting to break. Carol saw the other AA members staring at her.

"Stole what?" the director of the program asked.

"My, uh... lover!" Thank goodness for Carol's quick wit.

"Very good." the director said. "Mr. Stark?"

"Hello everyone! My name is Tony."

"Hi Tony." the group chanted once more.

"Its beena month since my last drink." Applause. "And I feel great! My womanizing is up 110%." After the comment was made, there was a long awkward silence. Tony coughed and sat.

"And now our newest member. Miss...?"

It took me awhile before I realized the director was talking about me. "Sorry." I said, with a shrug. "I don't drink."

"Oh my God. You're in denial."

"Nope. I do enjoy the occasional red wine from time to time, but other than that, nothing."

"Its worse than I thought. I bet you're drunk now!" The director stood and tried to hold me down. He himself smelled heavily of vodka. I almost choked from the smell.

"Get off!" I yelped. I was getting annoyed with the whole thing. The director leered at me. I couldn't move my arms. "Carol!" I called.

Both Carol and Tony took care of that lecher. When they were finished, and the room was cleared as the director was huddled in the fetal position, I altered his reality, changing the loser into a crate, which Carol smashed for me.

We arrived home and me and Carol sat on the counters. Carol drinking champagne and I eating icecream. We didn't talk about the AA meeting, but I could sense she wasn't going back. I decided to personally limit her drinking. And that was the end of that.